Attacks against your status: Sometimes parties to mediation will stoop to tactics such as purposely making you uncomfortable through seating arrangements, temperature or otherwise making you physically ill at ease. This could be a ploy to rush you through mediations. If it is really too uncomfortable, arrange to have the mediations resume at another place and time where objective and principled … [Read more...]

The One-text Procedure: In dispute resolution, a mediator can serve to separate the people from the problems, to prevent personal attacks, suggest some objective standard and help to draft the final agreement based on discussions. This text is called the One-text Procedure. Even if the parties are still far from agreement or refuse to speak, the mediator can “caucus” between the parties, showing … [Read more...]

BATNA In the book “Getting to Yes”, author Roger Fisher creates the acronym BATNA, standing for Best Alternative to Negotiated Agreement. This is your situation should the mediations fail and provides a standard against which to measure any proposed solution. This prevents you from accepting some solution that you would later regret. It’s not actually a “bottom line”, which can inhibit mediations … [Read more...]

“Dovetailing” is a very desirable method used in mediations wherein the interests of one party can be satisfied at little cost to the other party. Or conversely, is there a solution that costs you little but satisfies the other party? Sometimes differences in beliefs, attitudes and priorities can allow compatible dovetailed solutions. If such solutions can be offered, you can offer an easy … [Read more...]

Ideally, each party has come into the mediations with at least two ideas for solutions that would resolve their interests. Additionally, all parties should have open minds at this juncture in order to allow for free exchange of ideas. You may wish to propose two different ideas in one statement in order to avoid appearing committed to either one. Listen with respect to any ideas Listen with … [Read more...]

Remember to discuss interests and the situation first before proposing solutions or drawing conclusions. Avoid discussing past events, if possible, and concentrate on the future as affected by mediations. If it is possible that some handling of the mediation causes an emotional response from an individual, one of the best methods to defuse the tirade is to apologize. Even if there is no real … [Read more...]

As you enter the planning stage of mediation, you still incorporate these principles, generating ideas and deciding on a course of action. You will want to generate additional standards and options for solving the problems that have been outlined during the analysis stage. It is not necessary to establish trust between the negotiating individuals, since an equitable compromise can be reached … [Read more...]

Mediation is the process of communicating back and forth in order to reach an agreement. A wise agreement is one which meets the legitimate interests of both parties as closely as possible, resolves conflicting interests fairly, and will be long-lasting. Positional bargaining: Both side take a position, present their arguments, make compromises, and reach an agreement. Since both parties … [Read more...]

With the advent in1969 of the “no fault” divorce laws in Texas the divorce process entered a new era. One spouse no longer had to be "at fault" to get a divorce. The process remained pretty rigid because just about the only recourse for couples wishing to get divorced was to each retain a lawyer to “do battle” for them. This system is still alive and well today and can be very, very expensive. … [Read more...]